ephemeral-wake

She kissed me at 1am The salt of her lips leave mine And I stare at her coloured contacts She was resonate, like the month of April Residing in the warmth of noon And loving like the chill of midnight I’d rather sink into the depth of solitude Than bathe in a love that I never really deserved “Farewell” but only after a night hidden under our sheets

I don't want to live anymore no, not in a world of my own deceit where my persona has become my identity as though this is a war made for defeat and breathes are stealing my lungs from me: withering from every cigarette I consume now I can't even fucking bleed dry in every flowers colouring bloom to the deaf angels I plead: will I ever love out of loneliness? hands elapsing together in a vice my own mind a reincarnated mess what exactly is suicides melancholic price?

Dry nights and warm wine, my intellect is stagnating over time; age is tempting death to my own swine. Whispers in the breathing air, my begging for someone to be there, to hold my hands while I despair... to be held as if handled in fragility and your eyes a reflection of me: I will love you but for no one to see-

Breath like rain and petals shattering, falling into a pool beneath our feet and ourselves like a sacred monument, unite our hands against the sweet scent of colourless dew. Her eyes made me nervous as they glitter like the violence of fireflies. Whispering to a gaze, her voice bloomed gently into the cold night as she held her arms over my shoulders, standing on the tips of her toes. I tilt my forehead against hers; we smiled and I kiss her little dimples holding her deep in my arms. The cloak of mist runs thin, and the moon bleeds through hollow screams only to radiate onto her pure white skin. She was so beautiful... As the stars dissipat

the passing of time where lives at last intertwine incompetence giving birth I to a foolish child bearing a lie (a catalyst) ultimately perfecting the skill of unsightly untimely-ness destroying everything wasting my passive patience (my life) reset with less and I have to confess the irony of this lonely moment is a repetitive empowerment

I can still see the stars Like bleached lies within ours The obstructing leaves and with each heaving weeze I can no longer breath Dusk never touching dawn I await in forlorn Wandering under the sky that is deceiving

... pardon the fruition of my distinct intuition but as I feel the gentle breeze of your name writhing a disease; the envelopment of a history mistakes and your touch lovingly with memories maturing in every season you freeze the clockwork and I see ghosts of my honest smiles lingering from my heartfelt trials I drape my arms over you hoping to feel my existence ensue but I am cold as your touch falls through my sanity is shattering like solidified air evaporating Just who am I talking to?

I ate the off coloured fruit from the crying tree that sung with black and crimson lyrics it was sorrowful it was ephemeral and the season was cold as we melted our lips together after our eyes met through the reflective constellations you laughed with that gentle laugh of yours and I teared with the silence of that bleak tree where we both resided we both never desired such loneliness in our dreams and yet here we are in different beds singing lyrics of blue and violet I don't want to be alone but as I wake under the orange hues as if love is calling we'll never be together it was strange it was lovely smiling in foreign cities I held my

What am I doing... when I've lived my life so provident, yet we feel so far away. Ensuing my weak heart in corrosion my lungs can't even keep up I am so fucking lonely but it's only just my imagination. Like being left behind for being born too early but it's neither a curse nor blessing resembling the death of the mind- I am deteriorating like the wisp of a flame it's because I didn't care not ever under the hand of lust what a liar I am... I can't keep you sane I am so fucking sorry for falling in love.